Something I hate about myself
Most women in their 20's are constantly obsessing with their weight, making their body the most hated part of them. However, despite the cliche I can't help but admit that my body and my weight is the most hated part of me. I have struggled with being obese for my entire life. I grew up active and playing outside. I make honest attempts to work out whether its playing basketball, soccer, ultimate frisbee, or beach volleyball with a group of my friends or just spending a couple of hours at the gym. Its very hard though and I have a tendency to give up because I'm not seeing results as quickly as I'd like to and I don't have the necessary support to make the changes I need to make in my life. When I go home, back to Topeka, I just backslide because I live with a family of obese people who love to eat, go out to eat, and keep terrible foods in the house. I also feel depressed within a couple of hours of being at home because I don't know how to communicate with my family and I do nothing but fight with my sister and mother. My only escape is the little bit of time I spend with my dad before he goes off to work. I always go home thinking that I will have some opportunity to see my friends or spend time with them. However, as the years continue to pass I become out of touch. They have moved on with their lives and are changing a lot faster than me. This includes many of them becoming mothers, getting married, or having long term relationships. I begin to lose touch because I feel nothing but boredom when I sit on a couch watching TV in silence. My life in Lawrence isn't what I'd like it to be. I don't have very many friends. I think this is because I'm so introverted, but really I think that its because I'm fat. I learned very early on that people in general are extremely shallow and don't like to hang out with the fat kid. We aren't going to be as active, guys only want to make friends with girls that they could see themselves hooking up with in the future, and girls are shallow and bitchy. Maybe its my attitude that makes me feel this way but I honestly don't think I would have this attitude if people didn't give me a reason to feel this way.
I guess that was my rant about why I hate my weight and the different components of my life that make it hard for me to make the necessary lifestyle changes I'd like to.
30 Day Truth Challenge List:
Day 01 : Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 : Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 : Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 : Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 : Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 : Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 : Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 : Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 : Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 : Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 : Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 : Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 : A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 : A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 : Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 : Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 : A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 : Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 : What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 : Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 : (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 : Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 : Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 : Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 : The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 : Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 : What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 : What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 : Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 : A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself
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